30 things i learned before turning 30

cheers to entering a new decade

Today’s my 30th birthday.

Last year, when I turned 29, I struggled with how close I was to a new decade. I love my life so much, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that it looked different than I thought it would. I imagined I’d have a husband, or at least a boyfriend, maybe even a home of my own. I was so caught up in the timeline of it all that I didn’t really start enjoying being 29 until this past fall, when I stopped worrying about getting older and started making the most of where I actually was.

So I thought, what better way to kick off a new decade than by reminiscing on the last two and how they shaped me?

Here are 30 things I learned before turning 30:

1. There is nothing embarrassing about trying

2. Confidence comes from doing, not waiting

3. You’re allowed to want more for yourself

4. You can start over as many times as you need to

5. You’ll outgrow versions of yourself that you once thought were everything

6. Your life won’t look like you thought it would, and that doesn’t mean it’s wrong

7. Timelines are bullshit

8. You don’t need to have it all figured out to be exactly where you’re supposed to be

9. The least important thing about you is your relationship status

10. Your life gets bigger when you stop centering it around who you’re dating

11. You can want love deeply and still refuse to settle for less than you deserve

12. Almost will never be enough, no matter how much potential it had

13. You can miss someone and still know they weren’t right for you

14. Not everyone you lose is a loss

15. Closure rarely comes from other people, it comes from you deciding you’re done

16. The things meant for you won’t require you to abandon yourself

17. You teach people how to love you by what you tolerate

18. The version of you that keeps the peace is not always the version of you that’s the happiest

19. The things you’re most afraid to say are usually the most important

20. The right people will feel easy to be yourself around

21. Friendships will change, and some will end, and that’s part of it

22. Your world expands when you invest in your friendships

23. Growing up means realizing your parents are people too

24. The most powerful woman in the room is the one reminding other women they belong there too (Jaemi Pierson)

25. Happiness is a lot quieter than you expect it to be

26. Some of the best days of your life will be completely ordinary

27. You’re doing better than you think you are

28. You can build a life that feels good to you, not just one that looks good to others

29. The best parts of your life haven’t happened yet

30. You already know more than you give yourself credit for

Cheers to entering my 30s. I have a feeling they’re going to be the best decade yet.

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PS: My new novel, How to Find Love in the Cereal Aisle, releases on August 4th and is available to pre-order here. I appreciate your time and support more than you know! ILYSM <3

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